Getting Revenge Anonymously
Revenge is evil, but often sweet, and it can be hard to pass when someone pisses you off really. Here is an overview of how revenge works, the best way to adopt, and whether it really worth it at all.
The Dark Side Responsibility
All messages that belong to the Dark Side will include some ideas that might be a little difficult, or at least require some flexible ethics. Some things are downright awful, and you should not do them, but are either for your information or just to the point of interest (and will be noted as such). Your judgment and actions are your own, so think before you do anything you read here and just use your dark side for good.
There is much evil in the world, and it comes from all of us. We are all capable of terrible things in the right circumstances, and thus become a victim in a given situation is not uncommon. If you are a victim, you basically have two options: accept your fate and move on or seek revenge. Today we are opting for revenge.
If you have been injured in your life, you probably understand the concept of revenge. Often, it goes like this:
Somebody did something bad for you and you are powerless to stop it.
You want to recover, so that you create a revenge plot.
You ENACT said revenge.
All is well in the world.
At least, this could be an ideal scenario. We want revenge, because it feels like justice, but it is not. Revenge is not to get the bad guy and the restoration of harmony in the world. Revenge is simply to cause damage to the villain. There is no real justice, but rather a conscious choice to go the low road.
In fact, revenge could even be a bad thing as a study by psychologist Kevin Carlsmith highlights:
People expect to reap hedonic rewards when they punish an offender, but at least in some cases, revenge has hedonic consequences are precisely the opposite of what people expect. Three studies have shown that: (a) one of the reasons for this is that people who punish continue to ruminate about the offender, while those who do not punish “move” and think less about the offender, and; (B) People fail to appreciate the different emotional consequences of testimony and inciting punishment.
You can watch this in two ways. First, you can say that you should not simply seek revenge at all. That’s right, and a completely noble path to take. On the other hand, you can look at these things as obstacles in the way of effective revenge. Your biggest obstacle is you do not feel like a horrible person after. Your other obstacle is simply the obstacle you are facing: let go. I think these are pretty easy things to overcome, because there is a difference between a single eye to eye and hand clever revenge to make positive changes in your actions. The problem with most is that revenge is to bring harm and not harmony with the situation. If you go for revenge, you must believe that you make positive changes.
The Best Revenge is a good person
What thought sappy, right? But honestly, being the good guy is almost always the best way to go. Many times, that does not mean doing the difficult thing, but on the right, take the high road and be the bigger person. Sometimes it just means you have to appear that way. Whatever the case, the end goal is the same: look so good and honorable as your revenge target looks like a huge douche bag. Staying be a good person, will bring people to your side.
Long ago, I was waiting in line for a while at an ATM. In the middle of the line, a guy came to his friend-that was in place in front of me and struck up a conversation. At first I thought it was harmless, but when his friend ATM has finished using the machine passes in and decided to use it, too. At the time I am a shy person and most people never even noticed I was there. Sometimes I’m in a conversation with people and I would say something and people do not even know, no matter how hard I said. People used to cut in front of me all the time, what would be the last time. I began by politely telling the guy I was here before him and I would have said something earlier, but I thought he was just talking to his friend. He insisted that it was in line before me, and I think he legitimately believed. I think, like most people at the time, he just had no idea of my very existence. But that does not change. I got angry and I insisted that I was first. Finally, he did the smart thing and gave up. I got to use the ATM, but at that time everyone in the line thought I was wrong and he was right. Other people in line saying what asshole I was all the time I made my deposit.
I mention this story to illustrate a few things. First, picking a fight on minutiae is stupid. Second, the fight against when angry all sorts of ways, it can only end badly. Third, the guy who stepped in line before me has earned this interaction because he played smarter. It was a situation where we were both legitimate in the right-assuming he really did not know it happens online, of course, and he chose to be the good guy. When you’re the good guy in a public argument, you win the favor of the people around you. You are suddenly not fight the battle alone, but with everyone. It does not matter whether I am good or bad he chose to be virtuous and let me go to him even if he thought I was wrong. Ultimately, it made me feel much worse than anything else. He won by two things you do not normally think in a moment of anger:
Choosing not to fight.
Be the best person.
This is often the most simple and effective revenge. It is easy to accomplish. This is a reversal. It’s like martial arts, where you learned to use the strength of your opponent against them. That’s why being a good person is almost always the best revenge, even if you’re not really be good at all.
That said, I really do believe that in most situations the best thing to do is to be really good. Most of the time, it will work in your favor, as described above, and you can always make a situation (like scroll to the last section) on the rare occasion that you deem necessary. There are times when revenge can be a handy tool, but be smart about it and seek rarely. Few situations are black and white, so it is almost always better to be nice. Almost.
Secrets of the Dark Side is an occasional look at the different ways a little trouble can be used for good in everyday life, as well as some interesting facts and anecdotes here and there. If you have bad tips, send them with a subject line of “Dark Side” ….